Archive for the religion Category

Unresolved church issues

Posted in jim coleman, personal histories, religion with tags , , , on March 4, 2013 by jimcolemanmusic

TelevangelistI’ve always had this weird love/hate thing with churches. Having always disliked organized religions, churches have rubbed me the wrong way. Why is it that people can go around building these huge imposing buildings whose sole purpose is giving people a place to worship? I know, there is also the purpose of building god fearing communities, but let’s put that aside for now. Being a democracy, I should be able to build huge temples to Satan if I worshiped him (or her, as the case may be). But somehow, I don’t think that would be so easy to do. Christ, there was a huge uproar when there was talk of erecting a Mosque near the old World Trade Center location. People just get so narrow minded and fearful.

But sometimes I just love walking in to and sitting in a church for an extended period of time. Okay, I don’t believe in “God”, but holy shit, my mind becomes still and peaceful when I do this. I can meditate much easier. I become quiet. It’s nice.

Once when I was a kid I took a shit in a church. I was pissed off at this whole “God” thing that was being pushed at me. This may have been soon after a friend of mine died in a car crash. The first death that I had to deal with. I remember trying to make sense of this loss. I tried  a few things, including reading the bible. But nothing made this make sense. Now, I’m older. I wouldn’t say death makes sense, but I understand, or at least accept the cycle of birth – life – death. Kind of like a spin cycle in a laundry. But back then I was pissed. I wanted to take a shit on your organized religion, I wanted to shit on your God. Unfortunately, when I look back at it now, I realize the only thing I shat on was the poor custodian who had to clean it up. 20/20 hindsight. I don’t know your name, but I’m sorry.

Later in life, I went through a period where I liked to make out and have sex in churches. Obviously, still some unresolved issues here. And maybe a bit immature. But it was fun. And years after this, I had a period of bridge sex, which may be another entry on another day. I wonder if anyone has ever done a study on site specific sex? Anyway, not much to report on this except it was fun.

At some point in my 20’s, I was doing sound recording for a film in Texas. After the days of shooting were over, I hitchhiked out to the west coast, with a plan to go down in to Baja, Mexico. I landed first in LA. I had read some travel guide that specialized in low cost travel tips, and had highlighted a particular hotel in LA. I can’t recall the name of it. When I got there, the front desk gave me a price that was about three times the price that was listed. I argued with them, and got the price down a bit. Not as far as I wanted, but I was really tired so I just settled for it.

When I got upstairs, I turned on the TV, and the default station was some televangelist prayer ministry. At some point, they had an exterior shot, and I realized I was looking at the hotel I was now in. I looked around the room and quickly saw some other telltale signs. Fuck. I was in some kind of Ministry Hotel. Definitely had the shiver run down my back, the feeling like was in the center of the hive. Somehow, quickly, I had to claim this space as mine. I didn’t have much to work with, but I did what I could: beat off and smoke a joint. Then I walked out of that hotel till late at night, just walking the streets of LA (not much fun). I came back just to sleep. and was so glad to leave there the next day. On to Baja!

phew